Hollywoodland

Have you guys seen the new Verizon commercial with the geeky little guy meeting dudes from the mob in a remote location? The main Mob Dude says, “I thought we told you to come alone. Who are they?” Geeky Guy looks over his shoulder at the usual huge crowd of people, then replies, “Oh, that’s just my network.” Mob Dude gives Geeky Guy the evil eye for a second, then says, “Do you really get good service out here? I do a lot of business out here, and I’m tellin’ ya, it’s a crap shoot.” Then he goes over to chat with The Network.

In an effort to give my hands a rest from typing I spent a good part of yesterday catching up on stuff I’d recorded on TV. Caught up on Veronica Mars and Las Vegas, then watched Lara Croft, Tomb Raider: the Cradle of Life. I didn’t think it was as good as the original. But it was fun. I decided one of my heroines needed to be a bit more like Lara—

Excuse me, but I am nothing like Lara Croft. Hello? She’s a tomb raider. You know my feelings on relic hunters.

Oh, come on, Claire! Do you, or do you not hunt for relics?

If you want to look at it that way. But you know perfectly well I hunt for stolen and looted antiquities and artwork so they can be returned to their proper owners. Lara is a glorified treasure hunter.

Don’t take that sanctimonious tone with me. The point I was trying to make before you so rudely interrupted me was that Lara Croft is extremely kick-ass.

Sorry. I’ve been having this relic hunter/treasure hunter argument with some of my fellow professors. They claim that’s all I am. It’s made me a tad cranky. Anyway, I’ve always thought I was pretty kick-ass already. I’ve had to kill people during the course of some of my adventures, after all. You know that. You’ve written it down!

Your fellow professors sound to me like they’re just jealous. Ignore them. Your bosses love you. I love you. My friends love you. Tony loves you. So what’s to fret about? And, you’re right. I forgot about some of your exploits to date. Sorry. My bad.

You need to get back to my story. Tony and I aren’t getting any younger over here, you know.

I know, I know! Maybe you’d care to help me write Delia & Ford’s story? Hmm? Or convince them to not be so darn secretive!

I’ll see what I can do. But I’m not sure we really speak the same language. The 1920s are little too modern for my knowledge of the past.

Just do your best. Or rope Tony’s mother into it. She’s almost their contemporary.

Sneaky! I like it. I won’t tell her you said that. Later!

Whew! That, um, was Dr. Claire Maitland, archaeologist-at-large. *whispering* And she really is a relic hunter.

Anyhoo… where was I? Oh, yes! After Lara Croft, I watched The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. That was… different. I liked it but I kept thinking of ways I could have improved it. I guess that’s the writer in me.

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